Obsessive LoveWed, Nov 6th 2002
Dear Anne, I am a 44 year old woman, attractive, and within this past year, I have been through some rough times. I got involved with a man who I didn't love but he told me he loved me and I became "obsessed" with him. After 8 months of disaster, and 2 months to heal myself, I met a guy who I fell head over Heels for. I almost became a doormat even if he told me that he was not in love with me I kept on hoping that he would change. So, after a lot of pain, it only lasted 6 months, I decided to let him go. I was very obsessive from the beginning. Then, right away, I met a very nice gentleman and he seems to have some incredible potential but I cannot trust, I am showing again signs of obsession. I have only kissed him and he's been very understanding, I want to take it slowly with him, but I am living every moment with fear (not to see him, that he may be with someone else, that he is not telling me the truth, that he doesn't want me (even if he tells me and shows me the opposite). I like him very much and would like to try to keep this one and become intimate eventually on a healthy level. What's wrong with me? I have been in constant pain for the past year now and I want to get back to who I was before; A very confident, self-sufficient and happy woman. Could it be physiological or childhood traumas that are re-surfacing?
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