Depression: Depression & Related Conditions

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Psychotherapy and Mental Health questions

D.I.D. Diagnosis, How do I Accept This?

I am a 45 year old married woman, mother of 2 grown children, and I am a drug and alcohol counselor. I have lost my home, my career, and my marriage is strained. My relationships with my with my adult children are also strained.

I have been in psychotherapy for 15 years and I am diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), an Eating disorder, and PTSD. I also self-harm and have attempted suicide. I live with nightmares, twitching, headaches, and confusion on a daily basis. However, I still can't accept the diagnosis of DID. It has been almost 3 years since this diagnosis was added to my "portfolio." I just can't believe it is possible.

My family and friends seem to have no problem acccepting the diagnosis and this includes the State Disability Psychiatrist who fully agrees that I have DID. But I can't perceive of any childhood trauma that could have caused such a need for personality splitting.

Is this common to stuggle with acceptance for so long? Shouldn't I have those repressed memories by now if something did happen to me?

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